So You Want to Date a Latina? Here’s What NOT to Do

Having run this blog for over a year, I have noticed more than a few trends when it comes to the way people have come across my site. For example, the top two terms used to find this site usually consist of some combo of “[insert Latina celebrity name here]’s ass” and “Latinas + [different ethnicity] men”. So I feel I would be doing you a disservice if I didn’t at least give you a hint or two on how you can get the cute Dominicana in the next cubicle or across you at the bar to take your number.

**Please note. This is assuming you have already learned the least effective manner of approach is all things “hey mami”. Oh, you haven’t? Well, just trust me and move on. You likely need more help than I can provide here.**

DON’T Assume We Aren’t Interested

I think a lot of people forget that for a great majority of Hispanic people, culture trumps race. We are quite comfortable amongst Latinos of all races, as we share cultural traditions, a language and food. So don’t worry about whether she has dated a “White/Black/Indian/Asian” like you before-chances are she either has, or is open to the possibility. We’re in America already, so we’re quite used to learning and accepting different cultures. Walk right up and speak!

DON’T Start the Conversation with How Much You “Love Latinas”

Or end it with how much you “love Latinas”. Or throw it into the conversation ever, really. Latinas are not a monolith, and you’d be quite surprised to learn (if you ever bothered) that the traditions of a Salvadoreño are very different from say, a Boricua. What we appreciate most is you being open to learn about our culture and find out what makes us awesome as an individual, not a concept. I’m really not going to be impressed if you muse on and on about how “we” are. Like, really…tell me more about myself.. **rolls eyes**

DON’T Try to Impress Us with Your Remedial Spanish

This really only works if you are either in a foreign country, or are speaking to a person with no grasp of the English language. Otherwise, we are only smiling to be polite. Again, you are projecting what you “think Latinas like” upon my poor tired person. Instead of trying to spark my interest with what you already know, you could try keeping my interest with what you’d like to find out (a great alternative to breaking the Spanish out immediately? Try asking us to translate a phrase that previously stumped you). This also can be applied to showing me what you learned from the one hour of salsa lessons you took ten years ago, by the way. Your hips aren’t lying.

DON’T Forget We are Individuals First, Latinas Second

 My identity as an individual includes my identity as a Latina, it doesn’t make it up entirely. If you were looking to this post for the secret to what makes Latinas tick, you were never going to find it here. You are going to have to find out what makes your woman tick the old-fashioned way- by asking her. And you know what? I can guarantee it’s 100% more effective than paying her a blanket compliment accented with mami. Buena suerte!

 

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One thought on “So You Want to Date a Latina? Here’s What NOT to Do

  1. “DON’T Try to Impress Us with Your Remedial Spanish”

    I could not agree more. I love my boyfriend, but unless he’s trying to be funny with my parents or honestly seeking help, it annoys me to no end when he throws out random, grammatically-challenged, phrases that he learned on Nacho Libre or a some stupid punk song. Also, calling me foreign or attempting to group all Hispanics into the Mexican category is extremely ignorant and insulting.

    Please, non-hispanics, get a clue!

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